Alaska

[LongRanger]

I don’t know exactly when I first started thinking about it, but I can remember looking at this globe I had, one time --- not a big one, maybe 12-14 inches or so across --- looking for/finding the part of the world where I lived in, Southern California, then looking around, at the US, finding the places where I’d been, mostly in the West . . . small area.

I like to travel, go places, see stuff --- but I don’t think in terms of flying or sailing.

I drive.

'At’s how I grew up, in a car, my Grampa’s station wagon, going places.

And so, when I looked at that globe, seeing the handful of places where I’d been . . . made me think about all the other places where I hadn't, but where I still could, might . . . . . . in a car.

Mexico, Central America, then all the way South? . . . Ushuaia, Tierra del Fuego, Argentina. At over 9000 miles (one-way), the longest drive I can make on this side of the planet. But. Uncertain roadage. And me no habla so bueno. Bucket-list item.

Florida and the Eastern Seaboard? OK, OK --- but kinda busy . . . and settled, not exactly Lewis-and-Clark kinda stuff. And, when you get right down to it --- just not that far away.

Up the coast --- Newfoundland, Labrador, Nova Scotia? Now we’re talking. Wild, stormy, remote. Don’t know any body who’s gone there . . . but now keep going . . .

Hudson’s Bay, then Nunavut . . . The Northwest Territories . . . The Yukon . . . .

Wow. Lotta geography, there. No towns --- or roads . . . just place-names. Keep going.

And then, way over yonder . . . . up to the North --- where America almost touches Asia . . . the highest mountains, biggest forests, 2nd largest watershed in North America . . . . open country, and barely a city or highway in between . . . .

No political instability, English-speaking, and only one international border.



Alaska.

Oh yeah . . . and one highway to get there.

‘OK. I’m goin’ . . . ‘





Rick

[LongRanger]

Alaska.0

Started getting seriously ready in the summer of ’98. Seemed like a good time. House+finances were settled, kids’ squared-away, ditto everybody’s work . . . and I was up to three weeks of vacation.

Biggest Issue was The Vehicle. Destination wasn’t just Alaska --- if I was gonna make that kind of a trip, then I wanted to go all the way --- to the Arctic Ocean . . . where the tundra slides up under a grey Arctic sea. Not a tourist stop. No Hotels or ‘vacation experiences’ there, then --- or now. And no 6-lane Interstate. Getting there meant taking the Dalton Highway. (Aka the Pipeline Road --- 660 km/410 miles of un-paved whatever --- one re-fuel point, patrolled twice a month.) (Bring extra tires/wheels. ) (Maybe a windshield.) I owned two vehicles --- an e30 M3 (my Every Day) and a 356B Roadster --- neither exactly off-road ready/worthy. Adding another vehicle wasn’t gonna be possible, and the Porsche was staying, so . . . . adios BMW.

Money in my pocket, space in the garage . . . and a Rent-a-Wreck Chrysler K-car to tide me over . . . I started searching. I’ve only ever had one ‘regular’ car in my life, so, keeping my destination in mind, I wasn’t looking for a vehicle so much as A Tool for A Purpose.

List of requirements was short:
1) 4-wheel drive (period)
2) Class 4 towing-ability --- w/ receivers at both ends
3) 6000-lb capacity winch --- able to slot in either above
4) Radio --- CB, at least
5) Open vehicle with a stowable all-weather top

Thought about building something --- pop-top 4Runner came to mind --- but the time, expense, learning-curve, and inevitable depreciation/wear-and-tear/battle-damage of said vehicle . . . . kinda narrowed my choices.

To One.

Land Rover.

Defender 90.

I’d just about flipped the first time I saw one. Disco’s and Range Rovers were pretty common --- and swish . . . down in SoCal. Couldn’t imagine taking either one someplace dirty, then beating on ‘em. Ever. But still --- Landies have a reputation for being super-capable.

So, when I first saw a Defender . . . in all its spot-welded, wavy-alu-paneled, Tonka truck, kick-my-a$$ glory? . . . . Yeah --- this’ll do.

Not exactly cheap --- $30-40k? . . . . but I wasn’t gonna worry about having to beef it up, hurting it, putting miles on it . . . or depreciating it. Even back then, good D90s were pretty sought-after. As I would soon find out.

Truck was first imported here in the states, in ’94 --- and came in two versions --- Hard-top or Soft --- the latter as a two- or four-seater, with either automatic or 5-speed. Not exactly a hot-seller, at first, but when people found out that LR had quit importing ‘em in ‘95, everybody raised such a stink that they brought ‘em in for one more year, ’97, automatic only. Loaded. Priced accordingly. Dealers were still reaming people with a handful of hi-spec left-overs when I went shopping.

Knew exactly what I wanted. ’95 (NOT ’94), Soft-top (Coniston --- NOT Tickford), 5-speed, under 40k miles, service history (yeah, right!), minimal mods, basically . . . only the kind of stuff that could survive a Dealer-PPI. ~$35k. Also . . .

. . . had to be AA yellow.

Which happened to be the most sought-after spec.

So, started looking in the usual places --- favorite was AutoTrader --- and there were plenty of candidates (everything from low mile/high-option garage art to ex-rock-crawlers fluffed-and-buffed for ‘market conditions’ --- all priced accordingly . . . but nothing to meet my specs, and, most critically, price-point. Yellow was invisible. Arles blue was my 2nd choice . . . but that was a ’94 color, even more invisible.

After a month in my K-car, was getting a bit discouraged, so, held my nose . . . dove into the Dealer Pool . . . started calling every dealer in the Western half of the US. Had dealers, addresses, names and phone numbers for everybody selling Landies West of St Louis. And systematically called every one of those contacts, once a week, for about a month.

The truck I found was out in Las Vegas, a ’95 AA Softie, 5-speed, 32k mi, yadda-yadda-yadda. (Just think/say BINGO!) It had been offered to the Local Dealer as a trade but, for the asking price, too rich, so . . . it got passed-off to me. Owner was some kind of cell-phone minutes broker who was having money problems . . . you know --- a ‘knowledgeable enthusiast.’ My favorite.

Asking $40k but, as far as I was concerned, there was nothing to talk about ‘till the thing cleared a Dealer PPI. Called him up, got zip code, found Dealer, set things up over the phone . . . ‘call me when it gets there.’

Next day, get a call.

‘Truck won’t move.’

‘Won’t start?’

‘No, no --- it starts fine . . . . but it won’t go into gear.’

Hmm. ‘Look . . . Dealer’s good to go. The inspection is all on me. You just find a way to get it there . . . ‘

Another day goes by. Knowledgeable Enthusiast’s had the truck flat-bedded to the Dealer, PPI’s under way . . . ‘call me when they’re finished,’ etc.

So I get a call, mid-afternoon, Knowledgeable Enthusiast. ‘Transfer case is destroyed.’

Hmm. Suitably uncomfortable pause. ‘How much to fix it?,’ I ask.

‘$4k for a rebuilt . . . $5k for new.’

‘Well . . . I still want the truck.’

‘What ‘r’you offering?’

No pause. ‘$5k less than we talked about.’

Flew out that week-end, headed for the Dealer’s, met the Knowledgeable Enthusiast, the Service Manager, and the Mechanic, whom I not-so-discretely pulled aside and asked . . . . ‘What the f*ck?’

‘Five owners in just over three years, a stack of receipts and service history going all the way back to Santa Barbara, where the thing had first been sold. This truck has had a LOT of service. But . . . only when it needed it, like when something broke --- never really had any of the regularly scheduled maintenance. Like the last one --- missed. And one of the items in that service? Check, adjust and torque the transfer case linkages. Turns out a 25-cent nut had backed itself out, somewhere up top, by the lever, then dropped down into the case, grenading everything. Other than that? Thing looked like it had never even been off-road.’

Stupid.

I clipped that Knowledgeable Enthusiast for 5-grand. And a new transfer case. Coulda done more . . .

Turned in my Rent-a-Wreck K-car, took a bath, burned my clothes . . . then used the Defender as my Every Day. Good little truck. Had some pings pulled-out of the alu door skins --- not easy --- then washed/rubbed/polished/waxed every lovely inch of that rig ‘till the thing glowed. Took off all the oxidized rubber from the wheel well gators, treated them --- tires, too. Had the soft-top off most of the time --- swear, that canvas monster weighed, like, 70 lbs --- strapped a factory bikini top over the cage, modified a factory two-seater tonneau to fit my four-seater bed+roll bar (Pete Engle/Westminister Auto Upholstery), fitted a water-proof Tuffy Box in as a center console, cut-up some ¾” plywood, laid that down over the wheel houses, then stapled some remnant carpet down on that to make a nice grippy platform for the Nasty Dog, ARMY duffles strapped into the corners, new inch-thick solid rubber factory floor mats . . . . stuck on a Land Rover 50th Anniversary badge on her side . . . same year as Porsche’s.

Really loved that thing. My little Tustin Traveler. Cally’s Taxi. Number 2545. Prolly the most uncompromised mechanical device I’ve ever owned. Pure novacaine on any paved surface . . . but a tactile mountain goat off. And so yellow, you could spot it from space. Kids loved it. Ex hated it. Couldn’t wait to take it up The Dalton.

And then? . . . our Company made a business decision --- opted out of the contract with our customer, closed our Division, cut us all loose. Took a few months to wind everything down, and I was one of the last to go, but . . . . so much for Alaska.

Took maybe a week to un-load the Defender. Sold it for every dime I had in it, too --- ‘cept maybe the gas. (18 MPG) To an Orthodontist from Tarzana.

WTF


Rick